Halloween ended up being one of the drop dead funniest days of the semester.
But let me begin with two days before the funniest day…
The whole BYU London Centre got together for a party- costumes mandatory. Most people grabbed what they could find around their flats: bed sheets, pajamas, hair ties, etc. Thanks to my amazingly thoughtful and creative mother, I only had to look in my “boo package” to find something suitable to wear.
Donning my new t-shirt, tights, and hat, I went downstairs for caramel apples and pumpkin carving as a “good witch”.
Theresa and Natalia had decorated the whole Centre, which was so cool. After posing in front of these decorations for a trillion and a half pictures with Greek Goddesses and black cats, Sarah and I got started on our rock awesome British pumpkin. Oh! And she was dressed as a nerd. Like I said, we grabbed what was available… and of course Sarah had all the nerdy necessities.
I suppose what made our pumpkin British was that it was super wimpy! Sarah and I bought it at the Whitely’s mall, right next to the lovely pig and lamb slaughterhouse in front of the Gap. Our selection was pretty pathetic– back in the states we must inject our pumpkins with steroids or something. We picked out the one with the least amount of tumors to take home to transform it into this!
The eyes are thanks to Mom’s incredible package. There were plastic Easter egg-type eyeballs that we shoved into the pumpkin’s sockets. It took a while for us to figure out how to get the oddly shaped candle into the pumpkin without scorching our fingers, but the end result was pretty awesome (if I do say so myself).
One of the faculty’s wives made homemade caramel for us to dip our apples in. Then I covered mine in crushed Hobb Nobbs- my favorite British sweet. It was heavenly. We also were given baggies filled with sweets! Way thoughtful of the faculty’s wives. Unfortunately someone else lifted mine. But I wasn’t too bummed. There are no Reeses here, after all. Anything else, in the end, is just a waste of calories. Yes, that’s what I kept telling myself.
On the actual holiday there were no calories to worry about. In fact, we intended to crack down on schoolwork and be productive. We needed to see two “riveting” Shakespeare plays for our class. We’d had our Halloween fun, right? It was time to be serious.
Apparently I’ll never grow up.
As we were figuring out which exit to take at the London Bridge station, I heard a deep, menacing voice echoing from the top of one set of stairs. So I picked that exit. We came above ground to monsters on stilts and bloody clowns juggling on unicycles. Before we knew it, we were being sucked into the London Dungeon, completely forgetting about Shakespeare.
The winding line was about a 45-minute wait, but we knew it would only get worse as the day wore on so we jumped in. Scary and gruesome actors were weaving in and out of the crowds and one of them decided that he wanted us to take a picture with him. He pulled my arm through his and thought he would look real cool in our picture.
When we were nearing the front of the line, tragedy struck.
First, Sarah squealed. Jokingly, she said, “Either it’s raining or a bird just pooped on me.” She obviously was not expecting the look on my face. “Wait- seriously? SERIOUSLY?”
She started freaking out, tilting her head forward so that her soiled bangs wouldn’t touch her forehead. It was disgusting, but so funny that I couldn’t stop laughing long enough to help her. The rest of the people in line couldn’t hide their smiles either. Her jumping around and trying to pick out the pieces with a pamphlet was more entertainment than the fire breathing or the creepy actors.
When I finally had composed myself enough to speak, I told her to move out of the line of fire. Sure enough, the bugger went again a few minutes later- but even worse. Luckily Sarah was out of the way, but still everyone that had been watching the fiasco let out a big “Uuuuuh!” in unison. It was pretty funny.
When we finally got into the damp, dark London Dungeon we rushed through the cobwebs and scary music and headed straight for the bathrooms, where Sarah stuck her head in the sink. While she was dousing her bangs in soap I had a good laugh at the toilet stalls.
Once she was good and clean and had her wet bangs pinned back, we began our tour of the dungeon. It was just as historical as it was spooky. England never fails to share its rich (and sometimes awful) history. So we were taken through the sickening years of the black plague/black death, all the way through to Jack the Ripper.
When we were experiencing the witch trials, Sarah and I were both picked out of the crowd to be judged. We were led up onto a caged platform together. The judge appeared high above us and asked us our names and our crimes. As soon as I said “Elliot” I knew I was in for it. I should have said “Ell” or “Elli”…
“Elliot? Well that’s a blokes name!” he exclaimed. Everyone laughed. “Well we know this one’s queer, don’t we? I’d be willing to bet she’s guilty!” So my name condemned me. I was told to come back the next day with my own rope and tree.
Another favorite part of mine was our hanging. It was one of those drop rides, but in the dark.
When we were strapped in we went up until we were level with two moving wax figures: one was reading our sentence and the other was wearing a black mask and ready to pull the lever. I seriously didn’t expect to drop that fast… it was so awesome!
But at the end of the tour we walked into a room where our pictures were being displayed on a big screen. Mine was so bad that even the guys who work there- the guys who see hundreds of these pictures every day- were gathered around mine and laughing at it. OK- it’s true, my eyes kind of bugged and I was screaming bloody murder. My eyes actually hurt for about an hour after that… I think they almost popped out!
We left happy. Getting the snot scared out of us was way more festive than going to a Shakespeare play.
Next we hit up Borough Market for some grub. I’d been there with Roy before, but it was crazy crowded today. We looked around at every stand and took all the free samples we could get our hands on.
Well… not all that we could get our hands on…
I found cheese-lovers paradise. It was the most amazing cheese sandwich, grilled to perfection. Sarah got a bratwurst with some special sauce that they don’t have in America. Curry ketchup? We ate our lunches in front of the Southward Cathedral. It’s the super old one that Roy and I discovered.
Then we looked around the stands again for some good dessert. We settled on brownies. The British don’t like to cook their food all the way through, which I normally find disgusting- but I’m totally all for doughy centers of brownies! It was super thick and really delicious.
It was getting dark as Sarah and I headed for the London Eye. By now the tube was filled with freaks. Even throughout the day we kept passing people on the sidewalk with a random streak of blood across their shirt or something. But now it was just out of control. My favorite was this whole family dressed as Kiss. Even the little girl in the stroller had her face all black and white.
Now, I’m aware this is a horrible picture, but it’s the only one that shows the kind of capsule we were in. Sarah and I shared a capsule with about eight other people. The London Eye is the largest Ferris wheel in Europe. It lifts you up 443 feet to see the whole city. It’s basically England’s shot at their own Eiffel Tower.
At night we got to see all of the lights of London. It was amazing. Big Ben and the Parliament buildings were just across the Thames and reflected in the water. The city lights seemed to go on forever. Sadly, it did not make for good pictures with a camera like mine- but I got video that I may post on this blog eventually. It was awesome.
We passed up the tourist traps once we were on the ground again, and we went home for our Attic Halloween Party. We basically had invited flat 1 up to the attic for games. What would I do without my mom and her awesome ideas?
We played pin the eye on the monster, boo bingo, and then watched a few episodes of Goosebumps. By the way… Goosebumps made me miss the 90s! So ridiculous. We have been quoting it ever since.
All in all… a successful Halloween in London.
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